Tilly asked: "I hope that you will forgive me, because I am going to have a moan and it's about one particular aspect in life. There was a time, even in the face of all kinds of adversity, we would just grit our teeth and carry on. This was never displayed better than in humour. In the old days, there was the theatre. Where acts would make us laugh at ourselves, our neighbour or life in general. Now, I don't recognise the new alternative comedy as being remotely funny. Is it me?"
It's not you. Humour, is that unquantifiable quotient in life that we either have or have not. Some people are easily entertained and can see the funny aspects of any situation. Then there are others who have had the surgery to remove any residual vestiges of the humour gland and the hole stitched up. Now you may be wondering where the humour gland is situated. It's right next to the wee wee bits. because when the humour gland is working to full effect, we would often say we pissed ourselves laughing.
It's the same for the self proclaimed alternative comedy. It is as the name suggests the real alternative to comedy. Take a typical alternative comedy double billing such as Vic Reeves and Bob Mortimer. This pair did for real comedy what double incontinence did for your trousers. This alternative to comedy is delivered with a child like innocence and child like ability in equal measure. This is the alternative to comedy you never wanted to watch twice. Ross Noble, is another alternative to comedy. Noble in name but nowhere noble in nature. He is the man who makes you itch for a bath. But I was always brought up not to mock the afflicted or infected.
There are others like aged relatives who think that they are humorous, when in fact the cupboard is bare. When I was a young man and attending family weddings - these people would say with a black humour grin "I bet that you will be the next bachelor for the drop" To be honest I could not see anything to laugh about. So I decided that I would join in. At the next funeral, I reminded one with a black humour grin on my face "I bet that you will be the next coffin dodger for the drop" well gosh and golly, there was a distinct lack of any mirth.
The alternative to comedy is increasingly showing itself to be little other than a more aggressive version of the worst of the old comedy with all the humour removed. Real comedy has a litmus test that alternative to comedy has failed already. That is the test of time. So, don't worry about needing an alternative to the alternative to comedy. The alternative to comedy is a menagerie of bizarre characters invented for the stage. Comedy as we all know, can't be invented it is an intangible gift that few comedians have.
Today's, alternative to comedy seems to be built upon a dirty mind and a general hatred, mistrust or disdain for life and a love for political correctness. Performed whist clutching at the remnants of their genitals, after surgery to remove the gland. Telling incomprehensible jokes and carrying on as if they are an inmate on day release from a home for the criminally profane.
What's more, why are so many of them Ginger?
Regards.
Uncle Mort.
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